I AM a Mathematician

I just got back from the library. As an aside, how cool is it that I can go to the library at any time of night? Just one of the perks of being at Caltech. Anyways, I had gone there to pick up "The Ancestor's Tale" by Richard Dawkins, but decided against it; I have way too many books out already that I need to read. But on my way out, I stopped by the math section, to look through the various math books. My wanderings led me to the Journal of Combinatorics, Series A, Volume 105, Issue 1, pages 35-50. Why those pages in that particular journal? Well it contains a little paper that I happened to coauthor.

I went and read the proof of Theorem 3.3, the proof I contributed. And I have to say, it wasn't half bad. I don't know if I could recreate it. Now you might claim that I am just mentioning this to stroke my own ego. You know what? You would be right. But I would submit that my ego needs some serious stroking. I took an extra year to graduate, only to face the worst job market in years. I get a new rejection letter almost daily, and there is a non-trivial chance that I will not get employment anywhere. Some people don't even consider me a member of the department.

So I am going to take a moment to appreciate the fact that I am a published mathematician. This in and of itself may not seem terribly impressive; there are many others who have published far more numerous and profound results. But it's a start. And it's not like I found some rinky dink journal either; Journal of Combinatorial Theory is no slouch. I will continue, whether or not I get a job at some prestigious university. I will prove theorems, I will publish papers. I will not give up; to answer Tim Mcgraw, I want it plenty bad.

While I may not be all the way there yet, tonight helped remind of me of a crucial fact.

I. Am. A. Mathematician.